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I have lived in my current house for 3 years, when I moved in I set up a direct debit for my electricity bill for £50 month, a tear later I received a letter demanding over £800, that they claim I used over my direct debit.
I compleatly denied the debt, it is impossible that I used that much electricity.
They changed my DD to £125 a month to cover my ‘actual’ usaged, and demanded I pay the £800 debt immediately. I couldn’t afford to do either.
I was sure that there must be a fault with the metre, but they refused to accept there was, after months of arguing with them they agreed to change the metre.
In the first year I used on average £5.20 a day in electricity.
In the year after the new metre was fitted I used on average 64p a day in electricity.
Nothing gas changes, if anything I use more electricity now because I work fewer hours and am at home more.
The chamge in usage was instant after the metre was replaced but the electricity company refused to accept that the metre had been faulty and insist that I owe them over £1000 (it grew while I fought for the new metre).
I was told there was nothing I could do, that I just had to accept the debt and pay it.
So I have been making the minimum payments while paying a direct debit of £20 a month for my usage.
I am now moving house, and I am still very annoyed that I am being made to pay a debt that I do not owe, I am really tempted to just move and not tell them that I am moving, can I do that?
Emily F – learn to read questions properly.
I said that it was after 12 months they sent me the bill, not three years.
That was two years ago, after I convinced them to replace the faulty metre the amount that they said I was using droped from £120 a month to £20.
For that entire first 12 months i paid my £50 bill in full on time every month.
And for two years I have been paying my bill on time every month plus paying off a bill for electricity I did not use.
I have contacted the council but they can not do anything because the electricity company will not admit that they first metre was faulty.
They claim that they have misplaced the report on the old metre.
No, you cannot.
It was your responsibility to pay for the charges incurred on your “faulty” meter. Therefore, it was your responsibility to check your meter to make sure you were making the proper payments and to make sure they were billing you correctly. I am quite sure no energy company in the world would wait three whole years before sending you an invoice for all the payments you have failed to make. For three years, it sounds as though you did not give a darn about whether or not you were paying your bills properly and that is not the energy company’s fault – it is yours. You owe them money. Stop being a deadbeat and pay your debts.
ADD – For twelve whole months you paid £50 when the bill was £120, thus you obviously did not pay the bill “in full.” Most people open their mail and glance at their bills when they arrive, or if they pay their bills online they tend to sign in and check their account every once in a while out of sheer common sense. This has been dragging on for three years now and you still haven’t paid what you owe. If the meter was faulty and you ignored it for a year, then you owe the money out of sheer stupidity. Also, if you can’t scrounge up £1000 over the course of three years, you probably shouldn’t be living on your own and taking on expenses that you are obviously unable to pay.
If I have an overdraft facility with my bank account and they asked for a partial amount bank with the matter going into debt collection does this effect my credit rating? i have two bank accounts which i think must of had an effect on my credit rating so please help me with any info.
i have two accounts, both graduate accounts since being in uni and i s with abbey national and natwest
first situation:
with abbey national, i had a interest free overdraft facility of £1556,however without me knowing, the debt was passed on to debt collection(i think with their own firm). i contacted the number sent in my letter and they arranged to give me a loan of £1600 which i have to pay back £50 a month, i have done so for the past 2 years without missing a single payment.
second situation:
i had an interest free overdraft facility with natwest of £2000 which i was told that i need to start paying back by next year september. however i was sent a letter about two weeks ago saying that it has been passed on to debt collection(i think again with their own bank/company). i contacted the number and they demanded an instant payment. obviously being at uni or in other words a broke student, i could not offer an instant payment. so we agreed that i reduce the over draft amount to £1800 by the end of october. which i think will hopefully get me out of debt collections.
has this effected my credit rating in anyway? if so to what extent?
please help and thanks in advance
one more thing:
i took a gap year out and was looking for work. however i decided to claim job seeker allowance from the job centre. as i began to sign on i received the first payment but i also found a job(by myself and not through the job centre company) after a bit i got a letter which i think again was from debt collections asking to pay the amount which i received as a first payment, because it stated that iwas working at this time. however,when i contacted them to discuss the situation, i found out that this was the third letter they sent me as i did not receive the other two. after that i went straight to the post office and paid it off straight away.
has this effected me in anyway? was a couple of years back prob about 3
Every month every loan provider updates the Credit Reference agencies with their customer repayments ..
Each month, the report is ‘Paid’, ‘Late’, ‘Short’, or ‘Default’ (no payment).
The ONLY way your loan / overdraft etc. goes into ‘Collection’ is if you Default on the payment … and MOST Banks do not pass it to Collection unless you have failed to pay anything for 3 months… so by the time it goes to Collection your Rating has already taken quite a hit …
(1st month, payment 1= ‘Late’
2nd month, p1 = ‘Late’, p2 = ‘Late’
3rd month, p1 = ‘Default’, p2 = ‘Late’, p3 = ‘Late’ ..)
Since you agreed a reduced payment plan, chances are, every payment is being reported as a ‘Short’ ..
Of course Late & Short don’t count for much .. and the ‘older’ the payment the less it counts to your final score (I believe Bankruptcy stops being counted at all after 10 years and most everything else after 7 years)
our congress just handed a bail out deal to the auto manufacturer’s and also to the real estate magnates who started and perpetuated this whole financial fiasco to begin with.
in the order of billions of tax payer dollars with out any regard to the general populace.
what i mean is how does giving billions of dollars to the auto manufacturer’s help sell cars if the citizens cannot buy them how does giving billions of dollars put workers back on assembly line if no one can purchase manufactured goods or products.
if our congress was smart then they would realize that for only a few hundred million dollars rather than 25 billion they could turn our economy around in a few months rather than a few years.
by giving the taxpayer back what is rightfully theirs to begin with.
if our congress gave every registered taxpayer $50,000.00
then almost all of the citizens would be out of debt.
the sales of luxury items would go through the roof and put millions of people back to work. giving most of us a chance at starting over allowing truckers who couldn’t repair their vehicles to do so,people who didn’t have the money to buy stock’s or bonds would.
the turn around would be almost instant, putting money back into states and local economies most importantly it would put people back to work.
i realize some people would say why not a hundred thousand or a million, be cause that kind of money back to the people would lead to absolut chaos with no one going back to work, people trying to control other peoples money … the court system would be virtually shut down and nothing would get produced.
most americans total debt isnt more than twenty or so thousand dollars, so if our congress bailed the people out with a $50,000.00 stimulus package then most of us would be debt free we would be able to buy and purchase all kinds of products and even be abale to give something to out favored charities and other programs.
the revenue created from sales taxes would put the money back into the national treasury and eeven if we had to pay a small 5 or 6% tax on that kind of stimulus package it would more than aptly jump start our ecomomy.
rather than waiting for fannie may, chrysler, ford or g.m.c. to stategise and reconfigure thier market stategies whilst sipping mai- tais in hawaii.
which is probably exactly whet our senetors and representatives want anyway so that they can get back to having brand new cars donated to thier campaign mangers and free time share in the bahamas!!
thats my take..what do you think ??
by the way i wrote a simular letter to sentor mike crapo of idaho and all i got was a form letter reply.
if you agree with this idealistic view i urge you to e-mail your representative or congressman.
(my typing and writing skills are very poor please excuse multiple errors)
Yea, that would be a great start, we need to secure the plan with the Fair Tax Act! H.R.25
http://fairtax.org/
I recently got my credit report and score to take care of my debts from when I was younger (i intend on paying the full amounts within the next 2 months) and to improve my credit score to eventually be able to have a lender extend a line of credit to me. I have done some research and this is my situation…
I have an installment loan that was paid on time every month until it was paid satisfactorily.. the only positive thing on there 🙁
I have a judgment against me for $800 from Dec 2008 that will be paid but will stay on the report no matter what from what I have read.
I have a medical bill for $350 that went to collections.. it’s from May of 2006 which I may be able to get them to remove from my credit report with a settlement agreement and then I may not but it will be taken care of finally 🙂
The next two items are from the same debt and both show as open:
$450 from and unsecured loan opened in Aug 2008 and from what I understand they then sold the loan to a collector and it shows that I owe them $550 from Feb 2009. I know that the Original loan should show that I owe $0 because it was sold so I will have to dispute it…so…
(If I’m wrong on any of this please correct me)
I should write a letter to the credit bureau disputing which company has the right report currently (not sure exactly what to say though) to start with. Would I be better off waiting til the second collector has been paid in full with whatever settlement I may be able to get or should I start the process now. I understand the purpose of the credit report is to accurately show my credit history but I know having something removed will improve my score a little in the short term and I would really like instant gratification for my efforts even if that being very hopeful.
so is there any possibility of the Original loan being removed if I can show that it was paid through another lender before i dispute it or will it just show up as $0? (probably just wishful thinking)
Can I pay the Original loaner and pay the collection agency for whatever they paid for the loan and have it reduced to one thing on my credit report. Where should I start?
How much will it effect my score (526) to have this changed to $0 and which way?
I have been led to believe that paying them can drop my score so… What will paying off all of my debt do short term? Long term? (I’m doing it either way just want to know what to expect)
I intend to get a secure credit card to help improve my credit…Would it be better to leave a small balance each month but pay more than the minimum never charging over 30% of the limit or pay them off in full each month?
My job now is one of the best around here steady income Does that have any effect on my score?
Any advise on anything to help me improve my score/report would help a lot.
sorry it’s so long wanted to get all info out there because I’d like opinions on my best line of action
Negotiate a settlement with the collection agency. You can’t go back to the original creditor. Get the settlement agreement in writing and don’t give them access to your bank account. Wait another 60 days to allow the collection agency to update the debt as paid.
At that point, you can then send your dispute about the original creditor still showing the balance due. But be prepared to see your score go DOWN when the original creditor updates that listing to show the charge off. The charge off is a serious derogatory item. Showing an amount due would mean little to your score.
Getting the medical debt removed will help your score but you still have serious derogatory items showing. Paying them will not help your score at all. You will need at least 24 months of consistent, on time payment history to improve your score. If you don’t have an open, active line of credit, get a credit card, even if you have to get a secured card. Use the card and pay the balance in full every month. In about a year, you might qualify for a regular account.
She thinks I should keep my promise??
I don’t have enough room to tell you the whole story. I will give you a gist of it. The wife I adore and can’t seem to get over…… Together for six years married for four, My wife and I were like nothing else I had experienced. We were true sole mates. Over time and after one disappointment after another we both were not showing love like we should. I helped her raise two beautiful little girls and they have fulled my life with so much. I couldn’t fix “us” after awhile. I really didn’t know where to start. She made the choice to move into a second home we owned back in February. I was an instant wreck. Every dream we had was in limbo, I couldn’t do anything to get her back in my arms. I wasn’t the man like I should have been before she left and I saw how I needed to be to make it. she however didn’t think I would change. she was cold and distant nothing I did helped. It was actually making it worse. Everything I did got turned into something it wasn’t. I couldn’t win. About 2 weeks after the move she started to show fear?? I didn’t know why or for what reason. I had not done anything. One night she was acting really weird, like she wanted to do something but she didn’t want to at the same time. Next I know she had a no contact order put on me. A judge put a temp one on because she told him she was scared…… I was a wreck again. I had told her I would sell my backhoe I had and pay off all debt. I told her I would do this and that I would always be there to take care of her. It was my job that’s what I was suppose to do. And then this.. A no contact order. I fear jail real bad. I couldn’t sleep eat whatever. I didn’t do anything to have this on me. I couldn’t deal with it I like a dumb *** contacted her. I was put in jail. I got out I contacted her again by letter begging her to stop. Again I went to jail. At court to see if a perm.no contact order should be placed (there must be an assault} The judge never even talked about the no contact order. She told me if I didn’t consent to a court approved no contact order by consent I would have to serve 21 days in jail. I was dumb and didn’t know the law. I didn’t want to go to jail. If I didn’t consent the judge was going to find me guilty anyway and I would have to do the 21 days. Make a long story short. My wife obviously has lost everything she felt for me and i didn’t get it for a long time. 54 days in jail total. She stole a car of mine. She has come to my house and assaulted me. I had a no contact order put on her. she violated it I put her in jail . its a mess. I have lost most. I was put in jail one day for going to her lawyers office. Never saw her never even thought she was there. They set me up? I was put in jail and a $5000 cash only bail was put on me??? I did what I had to do I sold the backhoe from jail to get out. I got robbed, nothing I can do about it. $40000 machine and I got $7500. I was suppose to get $25000 because that’s what I had in it but the guy screwed me. Well my wife is pissed and believes I am a lier because I cant do what I promised her in the beginning…. She is the cause of this I should be mad at her. Seriously does she really think that after all the **** I have gone through I would give her a dime???? Should I… I realize I caused allot of my own problems but at the same time she knew how I would react with jail over my head.. Even worse I didn’t do anything other than try n save my family.
It seems to me you made the first mistake by contacting her when a no contact order was placed.
Why don’t you declare bankruptcy to get rid of your financial problems ? Maybe you can overturn the sell of the back hoe ? Because it was done in a moment of distress ?
I find it strange that a judge would approve a no contact order without some kind of a hint of physical or psychological abuse of some kind ?
So, whatever was going on in your marriage ? It is over now. Get a lawyer.
You should contact an attorney. Do not proceed with this process without the advice of an attorney, or you could face severe legal consequences.
Reference these free sites for free advice / assistance. I ran across these sites when I was looking for advice.
* The Law Guru Site is a great source for FREE legal advice.
It is free and has real / licensed lawyers. Don’t forget, lawyers will meet with you for an initial meeting for free. Also, nowadays, many lawyers will make arrangements with you for payments on a weekly, bi-weekly basis. Don’t forget, licensed professionals, like everyone else, are having a hard time making ends meet. They are willing to work with you. Just get out your telephone book and start calling them (if you don’t want to check out the site).
* The Dads House Forum is for men and women who experience the unfairness of child custody and child support issues.
* The Guardian ad Litem is charged to represent the best interests of the minor child which can differ from the position of the state or government agency, as well as the interest of the parent or guardian.
We control our own destiny.
Peace.
☺♥☻
I had been sexually abused as a child from the age of 10 months old up until 14 years of age, by a family member (although not my father or mother) someone whom i looked up to everyday. For years it has effected my intimate life, and partially still does. When i was 15 i entered into a very violent relationship which was physical and sexual which i was scared to leave, as he had threatened to kill me if i ever did. When i was 16 going on 17 i plucked up the courage to leave, with a lot of consequences and risks. When i was 18 i had also entered into another physically abusive relationship, but i had learnt my lesson from the first time and I left in an instant. Later on in life when i thought i was getting better with myself, i was in a relationship for 3 years and felt so proud of myself, but then towards the end it started to turn violent too. Then when i left pretty much asap, and moved away. I started a life, i was working and going to college, but i was in an area where i didnt feel safe. I moved far far away to a friends house, i met a guy i used to go to primary and secondary school with. we had a laugh and everything. but he wouldnt commit to being with someone. then i met someone off the net, then shortly afterwards i found out i was pregnant, but the baby wasnt his.
And although he knew about it, he still took it upon himself to raise him.her as his own. but then disaster struck and he kicked me out onto the streets literally. so i ended up moving into an all girls hostel. which was good, except there were two sides and they both argued and violently hit each other. bonus point was they all loved me. but being then 6 months pregnant, i couldnt cope with all the slamming of doors, shouting and swearing. so i moved out. i moved int a 4 bedroomed private let at a pretty cheap rate, only to find out after i moved in they werent going to accept housing benefit. so i was kind of stuck there, the house nextdoor was over crowded so two of them moved in, a mother and her youngest daughter of 14 yrs old. sneakily she moved in her younger partner who was a drug addict. then my money got stopped and i even had a letter to prove it, and she also saw my bank account at a cashpoint to prove i had no money. but that wasnt enough, someone has told her i ‘had’ got paid, so her other daughter of 16 yrs old came barging into my room then started violently attacking, her mother was running round the house with the air-rifle until she spotted me upstairs and pointed it at me. Her boyfriend spoke to her calmly and managed to get her away to nextdoors so i could get my things and leave. i ended up sleeping overnight in a police stations reception on hard metal chairs, with no company but my worst fears. a cardinal spider!!!!! i was moved into a refuge, where an irish woman then moved in only a week later. she has turned the heatig on full whack knowing i was in the room with the boiler. and she had also turned on the grill, oven and cooker rings full whack and left them running overnight, trying to make me dehydrate so that id be in risk of losing my baby as well as my own life. a dear kind friend i had made who lived around the area, paid for a taxi for me to move to another refuge over 200 miles away where i was brought up and felt safe. a woman who stayed in that refuged just after i moved in told me the other woman who stayed there, had told her, that if i had had a boy (which i did) then i wouldnt for long as she’d take him from me, and move away, and no one will know where she went. i soon cuikly moved from the refuge into a friends fathers house. i then got together with that friend, and ended up marrying him. although he failed to mention about the 14,000 worth of debt he was in before marrying me. then he was constantly lying to me, and constantly trying to cheat on me with my family and friends. only one though fell for it and ended up sleeping around with him behind my back. i actually found out via her facebook profile. i knew something was amiss. but a couple of years later i am with a decent guy, but yet i seem to keep him at a very distant distance, and our intimate side isnt the same as t used to be – i mean i tend to make up excuses or back away, i guess in a way i am afraid of getting close to someone but i really want to move on from the past and not let it effect me in anyway shape or form, so i can maintain this relationship i am in. i love this guy to pieces and his son too. and i wouldnt jeopardise that for the world, i just dont know how to overcome my past. does anyone have any suggestions?
Let me get this straight. You say you were 10 months old when you was first abused(sexually)The question i have for you is? How can you remember anything at 10 months? When you don’t even know what sex you are.?. For simple reasons. You can’t talk,walk sit up,know when its time to eat,sleep.don’t know day from night,left from right, what your name is,when to go to the bathroom, and all that stuff. So how can you remeber what happened to you at that age. I think you beleive all this stuff happened to you, because of what goes on in your life. And you blame it on other things except yourself. I think you are using it as an excuse, because you don’t want admit you were wrong about things. So you cling on to something that we can not prove any of these things happened to you?
i use aol mail and this showed up in my inbox awhile ago.
Re: Your Unsettled Inheritance Payment Reconciliation; From: Internet Crime Complaint Cente Hide Add to: To Do, Calendar To: undisclosed recipients: ;Date:Sat, Jan 14, 2012 5:02 am
Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3)
International E-mail Monitoring Division
Date: 12/01/2012
Dear E-mail User;
We are please to inform you of our new development and action regarding series of reports we received from your Government, Microsoft Office and Government of other countries last month concerning foreign debt reconciliation all over the Globe.
Your E-mail address was reported to this office last month by the Microsoft E-mail Monitoring Unit. According to their report; they said you have been interacting with fraudsters for some years concerning the release of either your unsettled inheritance or lottery payment.
Below are some fraudulent E-mail users you have been interacting with according to investigation by the Microsoft E-mail Monitoring Unit and Federal Bureau of Investigation;
Fake E.F.C.C Chairman
Fake Bank Officials in Africa
Fake United Nations Representative and F.B.I
Fake Board of Directors and Governor of Central Bank of Nigeria
You have been in contact with users of these Email addresses for many months and they have been extorting money from you by trick. This payment is legally owed to you by their Government so you have every legal right to apply for an ‘Inheritance Advance Fees Deduction Paper’ so their Central Bank can deduct all expenses from it and remit the balance to you without delay.
In order to put an end to this problem you have been undergoing with these fraudsters, we have sent an ‘Unsettled Inheritance Payment Letter’ to Central Bank of Nigeria and Federal Ministry of Finance of Nigeria for instantaneous transfer of your payment. We have also asked the Central Bank of Nigeria and their High Court to prepare all legal backup documents concerning your inheritance payment and send them to this office with immediate effect. If you haven’t submitted your receiving banking information to the Central Bank of Nigeria in the past, kindly provide it now so we can forward it to the bank for instant payment;
Swift Code:
Routing Code:
Account Number:
Account Name:
Bank Name:
Yours Sincerely,
Internet Crime Complaint Center’s (IC3)
[[im pretty sure this is fake, but shouldnt this be like a MAJOR scam since this sender is posing as the internet crime commitee?? thanks for helping guys!]]
100% scam.
There is no inheritance, refund or reconciliation fund.
There is only a scammer trying to steal your hard-earned money.
The next email will be from another of the scammer’s fake names and free email addresses and will demand you pay for made-up fees, in cash, and only by Western Union or moneygram.
Western Union and moneygram do not verify anything on the form the sender fills out, not the name, not the street address, not the country, not even the gender of the receiver, it all means absolutely nothing. The clerk will not bother to check ID and will simply hand off your cash to whomever walks in the door with the MTCN# and question/answer. Neither company will tell the sender who picked up the cash, at what store location or even in what country your money walked out the door. Neither company has any kind of refund policy, money sent is money gone forever.
Now that you have responded to a scammer, you are on his ‘potential sucker’ list, he will try again to separate you from your cash. He will send you more emails from his other free email addresses using another of his fake names with all kinds of stories of great jobs, lottery winnings, millions in the bank and desperate, lonely, sexy singles. He will sell your email address to all his scamming buddies who will also send you dozens of fake emails all with the exact same goal, you sending them your cash via Western Union or moneygram.
Do you know how to check the header of a received email? If not, you could google for information. Being able to read the header to determine the geographic location an email originated from will help you weed out the most obvious scams and scammers. Then delete and block that scammer. Don’t bother to tell him that you know he is a scammer, it isn’t worth your effort. He has one job in life, convincing victims to send him their hard-earned cash.
Whenever suspicious or just plain curious, google everything, website addresses, names used, companies mentioned, phone numbers given, all email addresses, even sentences from the emails as you might be unpleasantly surprised at what you find already posted online. You can also post/ask here and every scam-warner-anti-fraud-busting site you can find before taking a chance and losing money to a scammer.
6 “Rules to follow” to avoid most fake jobs:
1) Job asks you to use your personal bank/paypal account and/or open a new one.
2) Job asks you to print/mail/cash a check or money order.
3) Job asks you to use Western Union or moneygram in any capacity.
4) Job asks you to accept packages and re-ship them on to anyone.
5) Job asks you to pay visas, travel fees via Western Union or moneygram.
6) Job asks you to sign up for a credit reporting or identity verification site.
Avoiding all jobs that mention any of the above listed ‘red flags’ and you will miss nearly all fake jobs. Only scammers ask you to do any of the above. No. Exceptions. Ever. For any reason.
If you google “fake refund scam”, “fraud Western Union reimbursement scam”, “fake inheritance scam” or something similar you will find hundreds of posts from victims and near-victims of this type of scam.
I am a first time non violent offender, born to Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, and suffer from mental and social issues (speed, public pressure, etc). I am afraid of living now that I’m a registered level 1 offender for a E Felony which was a bad mistake on my end and I’m now in the spotlight and everyone turned on me in a instant. I’m not into underage at all and I’m going to prove that with state testing. I have no income at all and I was rushed through the courts as fast as they could do it. My legal aid lawyer f’ed me over big time and told me to plea guilty stating I’d be in prison instead of the deal of 10yrs probation, 20yrs sex offender registration. I have no family I can be with, and my only friends turned on me. I am jobless and about to be homeless with the terms of probation (can’t be near anything at all according to the maps). I am 30 years old, I was in special ed most of my life (up to 14) and I suffered childhood abuse (physical) as well as witnessing my own parents fighting when they were drunk. I hate pedophiles as much as anyone else and I made the mistake of 3 still photos which weren’t even sex acts. The costs of treatment, testing, and probation is screwing me over. I’m already $50K in debt, how much further can I go!? Court fees is $1400 (yes, they make people PAY to be on their list), and my treatment/testing is $1500, plus weekly sessions of $30. I want my life back, I want my family back, I got nothing left and lately been thinking of afterlife, and been threatened with mental hospitals. I will sell my kidney, a lung, half my brain, and my soul to get off this list. I can’t find a job because of my disabilities as well as the SOR now! All I need is counseling, not a f’n scarlet letter! Please if there is a jesus somewhere, help me?
We evilattorney, since everyone is telling me the same thing then maybe the police will be happy finding me dead somewhere. I’m not living this life in it’s current form and no one is going to stop me either. The good ol’ law of the USA once again f’s up. And to reply to the 2nd answer, I can’t even be near a church, so jesus can’t help me.
I don’t have enough room to tell you the whole story. I will give you a gist of it. The wife I adore and can’t seem to get over…… Together for six years married for four, My wife and I were like nothing else I had experienced. We were true sole mates. Over time and after one disappointment after another we both were not showing love like we should. I helped her raise two beautiful little girls and they have fulled my life with so much. I couldn’t fix “us” after awhile. I really didn’t know where to start. She made the choice to move into a second home we owned back in February. I was an instant wreck. Every dream we had was in limbo, I couldn’t do anything to get her back in my arms. I wasn’t the man like I should have been before she left and I saw how I needed to be to make it. she however didn’t think I would change. she was cold and distant nothing I did helped. It was actually making it worse. Everything I did got turned into something it wasn’t. I couldn’t win. About 2 weeks after the move she started to show fear?? I didn’t know why or for what reason. I had not done anything. One night she was acting really weird, like she wanted to do something but she didn’t want to at the same time. Next I know she had a no contact order put on me. A judge put a temp one on because she told him she was scared…… I was a wreck again. I had told her I would sell my backhoe I had and pay off all debt. I told her I would do this and that I would always be there to take care of her. It was my job that’s what I was suppose to do. And then this.. A no contact order. I fear jail real bad. I couldn’t sleep eat whatever. I didn’t do anything to have this on me. I couldn’t deal with it I like a dumb ass contacted her. I was put in jail. I got out I contacted her again by letter begging her to stop. Again I went to jail. At court to see if a perm.no contact order should be placed (there must be an assault} The judge never even talked about the no contact order. She told me if I didn’t consent to a court approved no contact order by consent I would have to serve 21 days in jail. I was dumb and didn’t know the law. I didn’t want to go to jail. If I didn’t consent the judge was going to find me guilty anyway and I would have to do the 21 days. Make a long story short. My wife obviously has lost everything she felt for me and i didn’t get it for a long time. 54 days in jail total. She stole a car of mine. She has come to my house and assaulted me. I had a no contact order put on her. she violated it I put her in jail . its a mess. I have lost most. I was put in jail one day for going to her lawyers office. Never saw her never even thought she was there. They set me up? I was put in jail and a $5000 cash only bail was put on me??? I did what I had to do I sold the backhoe from jail to get out. I got robbed, nothing I can do about it. $40000 machine and I got $7500. I was suppose to get $25000 because that’s what I had in it but the guy screwed me. Well my wife is pissed and believes I am a lier because I cant do what I promised her in the beginning…. She is the cause of this I should be mad at her. Seriously does she really think that after all the shit I have gone through I would give her a dime???? Should I…
If I was you, I would move to another state to get away from her. Do not leave a forwarding address. She has caused you enough pain and grief. Have you not learned a valuable lesson? Leave this drama queen alone and have no more contact with her. It is time that you look out for yourself. Now . . . RUN.
I don’t have enough room to tell you the whole story. I will give you a gist of it. The wife I adore and can’t seem to get over…… Together for six years married for four, My wife and I were like nothing else I had experienced. We were true sole mates. Over time and after one disappointment after another we both were not showing love like we should. I helped her raise two beautiful little girls and they have fulled my life with so much. I couldn’t fix “us” after awhile. I really didn’t know where to start. She made the choice to move into a second home we owned back in February. I was an instant wreck. Every dream we had was in limbo, I couldn’t do anything to get her back in my arms. I wasn’t the man like I should have been before she left and I saw how I needed to be to make it. she however didn’t think I would change. she was cold and distant nothing I did helped. It was actually making it worse. Everything I did got turned into something it wasn’t. I couldn’t win. About 2 weeks after the move she started to show fear?? I didn’t know why or for what reason. I had not done anything. One night she was acting really weird, like she wanted to do something but she didn’t want to at the same time. Next I know she had a no contact order put on me. A judge put a temp one on because she told him she was scared…… I was a wreck again. I had told her I would sell my backhoe I had and pay off all debt. I told her I would do this and that I would always be there to take care of her. It was my job that’s what I was suppose to do. And then this.. A no contact order. I fear jail real bad. I couldn’t sleep eat whatever. I didn’t do anything to have this on me. I couldn’t deal with it I like a dumb *** contacted her. I was put in jail. I got out I contacted her again by letter begging her to stop. Again I went to jail. At court to see if a perm.no contact order should be placed (there must be an assault} The judge never even talked about the no contact order. She told me if I didn’t consent to a court approved no contact order by consent I would have to serve 21 days in jail. I was dumb and didn’t know the law. I didn’t want to go to jail. If I didn’t consent the judge was going to find me guilty anyway and I would have to do the 21 days. Make a long story short. My wife obviously has lost everything she felt for me and i didn’t get it for a long time. 54 days in jail total. She stole a car of mine. She has come to my house and assaulted me. I had a no contact order put on her. she violated it I put her in jail . its a mess. I have lost most. I was put in jail one day for going to her lawyers office. Never saw her never even thought she was there. They set me up? I was put in jail and a $5000 cash only bail was put on me??? I did what I had to do I sold the backhoe from jail to get out. I got robbed, nothing I can do about it. $40000 machine and I got $7500. I was suppose to get $25000 because that’s what I had in it but the guy screwed me. Well my wife is pissed and believes I am a lier because I cant do what I promised her in the beginning…. She is the cause of this I should be mad at her. Seriously does she really think that after all the **** I have gone through I would give her a dime???? Should I… I feel I failed her and can’t get over it.
there is so much more to this than what you posted, isn;t there? i am not so naive that i utterly and firmly believe every word you post here without question, nor do i fail to pickup the nuances between the lines.
you know why i have no support for you? you mention all the things you did wrong, then you state “She is the cause of this I should be mad at her. Seriously does she really think that after all the **** I have gone through I would give her a dime????”.
so its all her fault? you seriously don’t take any responsibility for your actions and reactions? you’re just a poor innocent victim in all of this? in your marriage? in your finances? in your dealings? with all due respect – bullshyte.
sure she did her share of wrong thins, but it takes two to tango, buddy boy. now you pay your share of the price. time to grow up and re-evaluate your attitude.